What Would You Do?

Hey Guy's
 
Has this ever happened to you?
 
So last week my friend Rob went out and got 3 phone numbers.  One girl just pretended to not be there even though it was her cell phone...lol...

Then he called and chatted for 15 mins and she asked him if she could call her back, abrubtly ended the conversation out of nowhere.  So, Rob told her to call him back in half an hour but didn't hear back from her.  So, Rob called her back and left a casual message 2 days later (in an up-beat, happy, fun tone of voice)
"Hey, just called to chat with you; I guess you're not there, I'll talk to you later, BYE"

Pretty much the same thing happened with the 3rd one. Left a message yesterday but no reply.

Now, neither of the girls have called me back.  My gut tells him to just go out there and get more #'s  But he still wanted an (you) to shed some light on what he did wrong.  

Keep in mind, He's not that socially savy.  If a girl's into him, then he's unstoppable but If I'm not sure then  my game gets ripped to shreds.  Also, my phone game is  non-existent.

What do you recommend he should do?  In your opinion, what mistakes is he making?

Do you think he should keep calling these girls once/twice a week till they give in?

Should he change the messages he leave, or should he just use these girls as target practice to learn how to vibe and relax on the phone?

MY REPLY:

All right, let me tell you what you're doing wrong here:

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

It's the classic phone game dilemma. Guys get good at doing cold walkups on strangers, and they get a bunch of numbers and consequently feel a sense of achievement.

Which is promptly obliterated when they call those numbers and  discover that they're all flakes.

Look, you can never eliminate flakes; I've said this many times. The best you can hope to do is CONTAIN THEM. You never know  which girls are going to call you back and which aren't, so
don't take it personally.

See, a lot of times, guys will attribute flaking to a lack of  attraction. I disagree with this line of thinking. Girls go  into state, and forget about it down the line.

In fact, most of what occurs while a girl's buying temperature  is escalated will be forgotten by the girl. They become  disassociative and cognitive dissonance kicks in.

That being the case, there are a few tendencies that guys in  the scene have, that I think are wrong-headed:

1- Calling a girl on her bullshit for flaking in a way that isn't cute or fun, or in a way that sounds angry or like you  actually care. In my experience, the only girls who respond to that are the types who respond to this sort of behaviour in general, which is a certain type of girl that is not the majority.

2- Putting the girl in a position where she has to call you back or its over.

3- Refusing to follow up with girls who don't make it easy to meet up with them again by, and thinking that you're somehow  'NEXTing' them.

4- Thinking that all value is strictly conveyed in person, and that it is a bad idea to talk for a long time on the phone because it makes you look needy. Not that you *need* to call long. But rather, call as long as you feel like.

Calibrate so as to hang up before she gets bored, but enjoy the interaction as long as you want. It's just that much more comfort building, and is only taking you that much closer to the
endzone.

5- Giving up if the girl stands you up, because you think she isn't attracted.

For me, there are a few things that I'll do when it comes to the phone. First, if a girl flakes me, I'll tease her on it in a funny way. I never get angry or look genuinely upset about it. I never focus on reasoning with them logically.

I also don't give up if a girl doesn't call back. At the same time, if they say they'll call back I'll say I don't get upset like I know they won't. I'll just say "OK cool." and give them the chance.

But then if they don't call back when they said they would, I'll call back a bit later and just re-initiate the conversation as if I don't even remember that they didn't follow up.

In other words, stay cool, and stay persistent.

Play around with it... this is, after all, called "THE GAME"
for a reason.
 
As always I wish you the BEST
Vision

PS Thanks Jeffy